Küsisin abi. Mulle soovitati..

Did you honestly think you could simply read away your fears? The only way to get over a fear is to face it head on. No way to cop out of this one.


Maybe it's an ego problem man. Even the instructor go through this. You have to make it fun. Go out and your mission is to have fun and get slapped in the face. I mean that is your mission so GO!


Basically, the solution for your problem is to DO, not study.


You say that you've "read about" how to overcome fear by progressive desensitization, but it doesn't sound like you actually are taking the steps.


From now on, think in terms of DOING. Make your goal to get REFERENCE EXPERIENCES, not more understanding and knowledge.


So think of it this way. You read books about playing basketball for 2 years and now you're complaining because you can't make any shots when you play basketball. Deep down you know it's because all you did was read books and never played basketball. I think your solution is pretty simple. The knowledge itself isn't power, it's what you do with the knowledge.


The only way through hell, is through it. & it isn't hell, at all. Once  you start going out a lot, it becomes addictive (even if you're struggling).

I am so like that and what I have found is kind of f'd up. Go to a mall or out in a public place with lots of people and act like your talking on the phone. then get real loud like yell " No way ....  you have to be kidding me .... Right now" then do everything you can to just act like you hung up the phone and calmly walk about your business. You will be terrified and panicky inside like crazy... people will look at you!  But what will happen is you will realize you didnt die! You didnt get hurt, you survived and after 10 min NO ONE will remember even what you said!!! its a start. your mind will start to realize NO ONE pays that much attention to things around them.

People do not really pay attention to those around them like you think they do. I remind myself of this all the time! Tell yourself they will not remember anything and I will never see them again. Most people can't remember what they ate the day before! 

Get drunk and talk to anyone right next to you.  Anyone, guys, girls, dogs, cats, the half empty glass.  Just start moving your mouth, you don't even have to make a coherent sound, just start blabbing.  Keep on doing this to anyone, especially cute girls.

Congrats, you have successfully approached.  Noone gives a fuck what you do.
You owe my $2500 US.

Your ok man, really. Your blowing this little issue out of protortion. Your still alive and well.
You have to realize, at one point or another, that facing your fears is what will get you through that nervous bitch of approach anxiety. Yeah, it's hard, but it's ok. It's meant to be hard.


Your problem is that you have read and studied wayyyyyyyyy too much without putting in the experience to back it up. You have become a keyboard jockey, and trying to take the comfy way out. Going out and doing the deed is a whole lot less comfy than you want. You rather just sit at home and read about the science behind why you suck, and how to fix it, versus actually fixing it.

I believe the only course of action to remedy your situation would be to forget everything you learned, go out to crash and burn, and THEN AFTERWARD read about why things went that way, and go out to re-try it. You are trying to learn calculus without even ever attempting algebra. bad bad bad.